Orkut never fails to amaze me.Just about everyday I find some ridiculous group joined by equally weird people or some abysmally pathetic attempt to 'friendship' in some scrapbook.But then I realise it's not Orkut but people who amaze me.Orkut has it's own charms.
None more so than the today's fortune that shows up like a prophecy everytime you successfuly log in.I say successful because most of the times there can be a Bad,Bad server which means no Donut for you.And Orkut server would behave in this way,they say in the coming few days (almost a year now) and they apologise for being inconsiderate.Apologies accepted,especially since you give us the indispensable Today's Fortune.
"Promise only what you can deliver",it screamed today.I scratched my head to recall what I could have promised.Then I remembered I had promised to write about this.A great exemplification of how fortune favours the brave.
"Simplicity of character is a natural result of profound thought."It took me a while to figure out what it meant.And that profound thought made me realise how simple this was.And then the genius of it all struck me.
"A pleasant surprise is in store for you." This one is so flexible.If your'e suprised that it did not rain today,or how your roll no. wasn't called up to solve a problem...there you go! Fortune comes true.Tricky.
"You have an important new business development shaping up." I wondered what.Then I see the notice on the board about the mess advance payment last date.Important business.Lot's of money to lose.And Orkut warned me.
"Good news will be brought to you by mail." This one was easy enough.I saw the spams titled 'Enlarge,enlarge,enlarge' and 'Free university degrees' .Good news surely for people who know how to use them.
"You will inherit a large sum of money." How do they know this? All that secret cash stashed in the labyrinths of my house away from all the IT sniffers.All that money in the safes of Swiss banks.All this while I decieve everyone by toiling my backside (I wish) off for four years trying to get a degree. How could they? Of all the fortunes,I wish this one comes true.With a prior notice.
"Your present plans are going to succeed." For someone who doesn't know what proper planning means,this is an easy thing to say.No plans,no success.Bitter but true.
"You will make a profitable investment." This when I have just logged in into Orkut.Of course man,I've invested my entire reserves of time for you.Go on,Orkutify me.Amaze me more.
"You will be advanced,socially without any special effort."As I read this,the corner of my eye caught that my no. of fans had increased by one.In this virtual society,surely a virtual advancement.And no special effort,except logging in.Beautiful.
"You will travel to many places." They don't mention 'in your dreams'.But that's understandable.If your idea of places are the various numbered hostels and the main building and main gate and lakeside,then things are so much simpler.I travel many places daily.
"You are the master of every situation." Because everytime there is a situation you are alone.So you are the master,you are the slave.No hiding this fact.
"Your mind is original,creative and alert." Well isn't it?
"You first and last love is..self love." Hmmm,do I need to say more on this?
"You will get new clothes today." This is where it all breaks down.No matter how hard I try to interpret this in a favorable way,this one defies all logic. Orkut people if you are reading this,a very good chance of that considering how good you must be at wasting time,I demand an explanation.Rather on the behalf of all those deprived of new clothes,we all demand an explanation.
And it better be soon.If not then you might find a reason for leaving Orkut which you so innocently ask,stating lack of enough new clothes.Quick,I've cleared out my wardrobe.