Saturday, November 05, 2005

You're my Sunsign,my only Sunsign

There are a lot of things that intrigue me.Like the necessity of announcing new moons of obscure planets,the popularity of a French singer called Alizee in IIT's,the problem of breaking the egg from the bigger or smaller side (this one's been troubling me ever since I read Gulliver back in school).But,at present nothing intrigues me more than the sheer ease with which people are graded according to their sunsigns and how people,highly knowledgeable ones,actually trust them to judge people.Really beats me.

It all started when back home one of friends asked me,

'What is your dream job?'

I normally don't dream (seriously can't even remember them when I wake up),and if I did,jobs would the bottom priority.But I have an answer for each occasion,

'Ant farming in Zimbawe'

'Oh,you haven't heard.It's really catching on,only problem is Mugabe,but I can handle that.'
'What's your sun sign?'
'How does that matter,anyway it's Gemini'
'Ah,you are ridiculous.Typical Gemini.'
'I lied,just wanted to see.I'm Taurus actually.'
'Oh liar,that's typical Taurus.'

I quit at that point,because I saw where this was going.But ever since,I have heard and seen a lot,which is slightly unnerving.I see my friends and their friends actually quote someone called Linda Goodman to characterise people.So the guy who does not lend books or notes is Leo,the guy who flirts becomes Libra and the bloke who comes late in class and sits on the last bench and sleeps is Gemini.Of course I filled in the Zodiac signs at random,but I guess you get the point.Everything in the entire universe right from love,job,home to serial killing can be effortlessly explained by the sunsigns.

Mendeleev spent I don't know how many years to prepare the Periodic table.It took him 18 groups to club similar elements,with careful studies based on so many physical and chemical properties.That's elements,non-living and inanimate.People,on the other hand,need just 12 groups if you go by this classification.Really tells something.I wish they make one of those tables where they list all the properties of a particular group so that before I'm going to deal with someone,I know if he will treat me with his money or share the bill or make me pay it.Would come really handy.

People and periodic table would an interesting fusion though.The active ones would be either acidic or alkalis,the noble ones would be..well noble metals,the lazy ones would be inert,the colourful one be transition and the dangerous ones radioactive.Something at least as ridiculous as present system.I'll be Nickel,we have just too many things in common-similar sounding name,pretty close weight..isn't that enough? Choose your element :D

Hitler had one ball,was a mass killer.Aww..that's typical Virgo? I dunno,just taking a guess.There are exceptions I guess.

Linda Goodman,I'm going to kill you if I ever meet you.But I have a feeling that one of the newspapers will carry a report in which one of her close friends will reveal the conversation that she had before her death,

'Oh Linda was a great woman,very prophetic too.Just yesterday she told me that she has a feeling that she will get murdered.And the murderer would be a Taurus,that's so typical of them.Linda was a true Aquarius and only a Saggi like me can understand her.'

This would make a fool of me,so I'll rather not do that.

I'm happy with what the weight ticket that comes out of those flashy kiosks at railway platforms for Re. 1 says about me-

'You're charismatic,funny,ambitious,truthful and very down to earth',and has a hazy picture of Aamir Khaan above this insightful sentence.

Ok I made that 'about me' bit,is that typical Taurus?


thedq said...

lol :-)... Piecian (whatever) women are supposed to be day dreamers ,which i am. I think some statements are true! However, one has to be able to distinguish between nailed down characteristics and generic statements like "XYZ stars sign people are more likely to pursue careers in 'arts, science or commerce'." :-)

Nikhil said...

After reading your comment I actually went through what they have to say about

Jealous and possessive
Resentful and inflexible
Self-indulgent and greedy

I could take it upto this,but then it mentioned-
the color of choice for Taurus is PINK

I broke down into tears right then.

Anonymous said...

lovely post....resonates a lot with what i think about sunsigns...
ha! the ppl who read their horoscopes every day in the morning newspaper, as if it's the end of their life, and BELIEVE in it like hell...cracks me up completely...i know of ppl who find ONLY that bit interesting in the paper...and a lot of them are girls! can ppl, crores of them, be bunched together with same fates and same "types of nature"
in one sentence.

Baffling, but yeah, it's one of the most long-lasting fads..

Briliiant post!

thelearner said...

If you thnk about it, it's all about people trying to classify themselves rather than other people classifying them. When you feel jealous and possessive, you attribute it to your being Taurean instead of a flaw in your personality. Gives you comfort. That's why Ms. Goodman sells.

Or you could be banging your head, cursing yourself for being born a Taurean.

Nikhil said...

[thelearner] Man!!! People are getting serious reading this,THIS?

Spare a thought.If I ahd to think about anything why would I be writing in such a nonsenscial maaner?

Anyway I have much more ridiculous things to think about than thinking about being 'jealous and possesive' and my 'flaw in personality'.Will save it for a later day.

Till then I get back to banging my head.
Thanks for taking the time out.

Your Friend In Spirit said...

[quote]Linda Goodman,I'm going to kill you if I ever meet you.But I have a feeling that one of the newspapers will carry a report in which one of her close friends will reveal the conversation that she had before her death,
[end quote]

Dude, she died 10 years prior to you writing this! How disrespectful can you be?

Nikhil said...

I forgot a disclaimer.

The characters in this piece are fictional, and any resemblance, including similar names, to people living or dead is entirely coincidental and for illustrative purposes only. The author of this piece does not intend to really be disrespectful to anyone living or dead. Even Hitler. This being a piece of attempted humor/hyberbole he hopes people will try and take it same way.